Tonight I was reading through a few blogs that I read on a regular basis when they have been updated. I love to hear about what all is going on in a persons life and to see how God is working along every step of the way. I love to blog myself. I don't always have something to write and sometimes I may even put something stupid or insignificant in, but hey, I guess that's why its my blog and I can do that.
Tonight I was reading a blog that I just added to my frequent blog list. Written by a great guy that went on our beach retreat this past weekend. He last updated his blog about 5 weeks ago and looks to be getting started back into blogging but his story is awesome about how he has come to where he is today. I encourage you to go and read it. It's the blog by Derek Starr on my blog list. Great short read but full of the gospel.
Maybe you have thought about writing a blog. I encourage it, even if you end up being the only one that reads it. It's a great place to put in words how God works in your life and hence sharing the example of His love, mercy, and grace in your life.
Thursday, May 29, 2008
Tuesday, May 27, 2008
A little something that needs to be said, finally.
I have not posted anything in a little while now, but tonight I have something that I need to say. Straight to the point...
If you observe two people engaging in conversation, if you notice someone flirting with someone, if you pick up on the possibility that a guy may be interested in a particular girl or a girl interested in a guy, please, whatever you do, please don't approach one of those two people to ask them what is up or to try and find out if your observations or assumptions are correct.
THIS is where the pressure comes from.
Two people. A guy and a girl are simply trying to get to know each other better, minding their own business, feeling things out. Maybe it will lead to something, maybe it will not, but regardless in due time whatever the result is, it will be revealed. On its own time, in its own way, and between those two people. Ultimately, and I am only speaking in a firm tone, not anger, not frustration, but firm because it is time for it to just be said; Just try to just mind your own business and let others just be themselves.
The PRESSURE is not between the two who are trying to get to know each other.
The PRESSURE comes from outside the realm of those two, it comes from those who have observed, from those who have witnessed conversations, from those who have seen someone flirt or be affectionate with someone else. So what would give this outside person the right? What gives this person the right to just walk right up and point blank ask one of those two what is up? What would give this person the right to discuss it among others behind the "subjects" backs?
I think there could only be one reason, and that would be if you knew for a fact; not through assumption, not a gut feeling, not even something you necessarily heard from someone else that you think is trustworthy and dependable, but only a fact that you know about one of the people that could put the other in some kind of legitimate jeopardy or compromising position.
It's hard enough to sometimes have the guts to try and get to know people as friends much less to try and figure out if you want to date someone or not. Please understand, I do not speak in anger or frustration, I just feel it is due time for this to be said. It is a fact that it hinders both the guy and the girl that are trying to get to know one another better, so next time you're tempted, just stop for a minute and think it all through, and better yet, stop and just pray silently for the two that you notice, that God would give them clear eyes to see, that God would reveal Himself to each of them through the other, that God would simply just be in the middle of everything that is said and comes to be.
A confession - I am guilty of everything I've said above too. The difference for me today is that now I see my own sin in this and have for some time and since that time have tried my best just to mind my own business. In the end, if one of those people want me to know, if we have that level of friendship, they will tell me, BUT, it will be in their time and their way, not my own.
Feel free to pass this along or make comments. I would love to hear what you think. Thanks as always for reading.
Sincerely,
Jason J.
If you observe two people engaging in conversation, if you notice someone flirting with someone, if you pick up on the possibility that a guy may be interested in a particular girl or a girl interested in a guy, please, whatever you do, please don't approach one of those two people to ask them what is up or to try and find out if your observations or assumptions are correct.
THIS is where the pressure comes from.
Two people. A guy and a girl are simply trying to get to know each other better, minding their own business, feeling things out. Maybe it will lead to something, maybe it will not, but regardless in due time whatever the result is, it will be revealed. On its own time, in its own way, and between those two people. Ultimately, and I am only speaking in a firm tone, not anger, not frustration, but firm because it is time for it to just be said; Just try to just mind your own business and let others just be themselves.
The PRESSURE is not between the two who are trying to get to know each other.
The PRESSURE comes from outside the realm of those two, it comes from those who have observed, from those who have witnessed conversations, from those who have seen someone flirt or be affectionate with someone else. So what would give this outside person the right? What gives this person the right to just walk right up and point blank ask one of those two what is up? What would give this person the right to discuss it among others behind the "subjects" backs?
I think there could only be one reason, and that would be if you knew for a fact; not through assumption, not a gut feeling, not even something you necessarily heard from someone else that you think is trustworthy and dependable, but only a fact that you know about one of the people that could put the other in some kind of legitimate jeopardy or compromising position.
It's hard enough to sometimes have the guts to try and get to know people as friends much less to try and figure out if you want to date someone or not. Please understand, I do not speak in anger or frustration, I just feel it is due time for this to be said. It is a fact that it hinders both the guy and the girl that are trying to get to know one another better, so next time you're tempted, just stop for a minute and think it all through, and better yet, stop and just pray silently for the two that you notice, that God would give them clear eyes to see, that God would reveal Himself to each of them through the other, that God would simply just be in the middle of everything that is said and comes to be.
A confession - I am guilty of everything I've said above too. The difference for me today is that now I see my own sin in this and have for some time and since that time have tried my best just to mind my own business. In the end, if one of those people want me to know, if we have that level of friendship, they will tell me, BUT, it will be in their time and their way, not my own.
Feel free to pass this along or make comments. I would love to hear what you think. Thanks as always for reading.
Sincerely,
Jason J.
Wednesday, May 7, 2008
Praying is believing...
This past Monday, I sat there in my truck as I always do before going into work. I usually do this just to get a little quiet time whether it be time in the Word, journaling, and/or praying. On this day I was kind of fretting, okay....not kind of, I was fretting, sweating bullets just to be honest about this Friday's Homeless event that our Singles group helps out with each month. I recently acquired leadership to some degree of our group's part of this monthly event, which for the most part is mostly logistical but also a motivational role to encourage participation from within our Singles group.
This month it is our turn to provide the food for the meal on Friday night. Doesn't really matter where it comes from, whether we take up donations from within or ask a local restaurant or store to help us out with the meal. I had been somewhat working on this for about a good solid week prior to Monday and coming up with nothing. This month I really did not want to try to reach into the pockets of the Singles group because of other things knowingly going on that was already costing money, so I was calling and going to see various restaurant and store managers around the area. "Man, wish we could, but we're pretty squeezed right now", or "I definitely want to help, but our budget will not allow it this month. How about in a month or two?" are the things I was hearing just about everywhere I went. Don't get me wrong here...what I did see was that people all over town are generally compassionate about this type of ministry and really do want to help, but timing is key in all situations. It was great to see more compassionate views than negative, because honestly I thought I would run into a lot more negativity.
To the point now...As I was sitting there in my truck Monday working up a calling strategy and thinking about what I could say to those I talked to I thought to myself suddenly, "have I even prayed about this need specifically?" I really had not. Honestly I had been praying those walking or driving prayers that I think most do where you mumble to the Lord that you need help with this or that, but I had not specifically asked God to provide for this need and even going as far as telling exactly what we needed and then trusting in Him just to provide it.
So I prayed and from what I recall it went something like this...Lord, you know the worries in my heart over this and I ask Your forgiveness for that, and I pray as I lay these needs down at the foot of Your Cross, that You, Oh Lord would provide for this event. I pray specifically Lord that you would provide whatever possible but our need is for enough food to feed 50-75 homeless people. I know You can provide this and now I specifically ask that You would. I also pray Lord that this part of the logistics could even be wrapped up today sometime it would be wonderful but even if it is a last second commitment, praise be to You. In Your Son's Gracious Name, Amen.
I know this is getting long but stick with me here. I spent a really good bit of time on the phone calling folks and even another friend was checking with a store or two on his end of town for me. Then at 3:30 I talked to the manager of a particular Italian restaurant in the area. Really nice guy again, and he even said that he really wasn't sure what he could do but to go ahead and send him over a letter, and he would give me a call back on my cell in a couple of hours or so. I told him I'd be glad to and faxed him a letter right over. I think almost an hour went by and my cell rang and it was him. He said, Jason I reviewed your letter and check our budget and we're going to take care of your needs this month! I was honestly chocked up so the only thing I heard him say past that was that he was going to provide spaghetti and marinara sauce for 60 people (which if need be can easily be stretched). I thanked him graciously and we hung up. "Praise God!" were the first words from my mouth and honestly, I was still in a bit of shock. A little later I was talking to the other friend that was helping me earlier and he asked about salad, dressing and all that...I told him that I thought he had said salad, but I thought we may need to come up with some bread. So I ended up calling the restaurant manager back. I told him that I thought I was so happy and chocked up that I must not have heard everything he said, and if he could repeat what all they were going to provide...He said sure, that they were going to do the spaghetti with marinara sauce, salads, dressings, and bread sticks too. Can you believe it? Because I still am a little overwhelmed by it all. Mostly, I am just thankful to the Lord, for His provision, His generous provision in this need.
This month it is our turn to provide the food for the meal on Friday night. Doesn't really matter where it comes from, whether we take up donations from within or ask a local restaurant or store to help us out with the meal. I had been somewhat working on this for about a good solid week prior to Monday and coming up with nothing. This month I really did not want to try to reach into the pockets of the Singles group because of other things knowingly going on that was already costing money, so I was calling and going to see various restaurant and store managers around the area. "Man, wish we could, but we're pretty squeezed right now", or "I definitely want to help, but our budget will not allow it this month. How about in a month or two?" are the things I was hearing just about everywhere I went. Don't get me wrong here...what I did see was that people all over town are generally compassionate about this type of ministry and really do want to help, but timing is key in all situations. It was great to see more compassionate views than negative, because honestly I thought I would run into a lot more negativity.
To the point now...As I was sitting there in my truck Monday working up a calling strategy and thinking about what I could say to those I talked to I thought to myself suddenly, "have I even prayed about this need specifically?" I really had not. Honestly I had been praying those walking or driving prayers that I think most do where you mumble to the Lord that you need help with this or that, but I had not specifically asked God to provide for this need and even going as far as telling exactly what we needed and then trusting in Him just to provide it.
So I prayed and from what I recall it went something like this...Lord, you know the worries in my heart over this and I ask Your forgiveness for that, and I pray as I lay these needs down at the foot of Your Cross, that You, Oh Lord would provide for this event. I pray specifically Lord that you would provide whatever possible but our need is for enough food to feed 50-75 homeless people. I know You can provide this and now I specifically ask that You would. I also pray Lord that this part of the logistics could even be wrapped up today sometime it would be wonderful but even if it is a last second commitment, praise be to You. In Your Son's Gracious Name, Amen.
I know this is getting long but stick with me here. I spent a really good bit of time on the phone calling folks and even another friend was checking with a store or two on his end of town for me. Then at 3:30 I talked to the manager of a particular Italian restaurant in the area. Really nice guy again, and he even said that he really wasn't sure what he could do but to go ahead and send him over a letter, and he would give me a call back on my cell in a couple of hours or so. I told him I'd be glad to and faxed him a letter right over. I think almost an hour went by and my cell rang and it was him. He said, Jason I reviewed your letter and check our budget and we're going to take care of your needs this month! I was honestly chocked up so the only thing I heard him say past that was that he was going to provide spaghetti and marinara sauce for 60 people (which if need be can easily be stretched). I thanked him graciously and we hung up. "Praise God!" were the first words from my mouth and honestly, I was still in a bit of shock. A little later I was talking to the other friend that was helping me earlier and he asked about salad, dressing and all that...I told him that I thought he had said salad, but I thought we may need to come up with some bread. So I ended up calling the restaurant manager back. I told him that I thought I was so happy and chocked up that I must not have heard everything he said, and if he could repeat what all they were going to provide...He said sure, that they were going to do the spaghetti with marinara sauce, salads, dressings, and bread sticks too. Can you believe it? Because I still am a little overwhelmed by it all. Mostly, I am just thankful to the Lord, for His provision, His generous provision in this need.
Sunday, May 4, 2008
A stop in the wall...
Chiseling, hammering, and chipping away at the stone and mortar...much progress has been made but suddenly stopped. "Going Through the Wall", a lifelong journey, where there will be many stops along the way. These stops are the places that God desires to dig out of me the muck and sin of many layers built up over years of sloppy patches and/or survival protections put in place by me to lighten my own load, to lighten the sadness, to put away the anger, to take away the disappointment, with the sole purpose of making it look like I have it all together.
I have a choice here to some degree...I can either back up and back out of the wall. From all the progress, from all the grace, from all the love and mercy that God has already given without condition to go and try to find my own way around or over or maybe even under the wall to avoid the possible suffering that may come from continuing through the wall...
OR...
I can stay there, in the midst of the wall; dark and lonely as it may seem, lies of hopelessness roaring through the mind attempting to devour me and continued sweat and tears that will surely come from the work. I say "dark and lonely as it may seem" because really I am not alone, not at all. God is right there, showing me the next stone to chip away at, lighting the dark tunnel before me and bringing to light the sin and muck that needs to be dealt with. He desires for me to stay in it, to allow myself to feel my emotions that I may have been stuffing away for years; emotions of fear, anger, sadness, and loss. This, so that He may finally cut those things out of my flesh and heart, so that He can replace it all with His love, His mercy, His sufficiency. He doesn't stop there, He, the great Doctor of our lives, will mend our wounds, will heal our hurts, and will bring "renewal and restoration" to our heart and soul. This is as my pastor talked about in his sermon today "Restorative Transformation".
I have decided. I'm going to stay.
I have a choice here to some degree...I can either back up and back out of the wall. From all the progress, from all the grace, from all the love and mercy that God has already given without condition to go and try to find my own way around or over or maybe even under the wall to avoid the possible suffering that may come from continuing through the wall...
OR...
I can stay there, in the midst of the wall; dark and lonely as it may seem, lies of hopelessness roaring through the mind attempting to devour me and continued sweat and tears that will surely come from the work. I say "dark and lonely as it may seem" because really I am not alone, not at all. God is right there, showing me the next stone to chip away at, lighting the dark tunnel before me and bringing to light the sin and muck that needs to be dealt with. He desires for me to stay in it, to allow myself to feel my emotions that I may have been stuffing away for years; emotions of fear, anger, sadness, and loss. This, so that He may finally cut those things out of my flesh and heart, so that He can replace it all with His love, His mercy, His sufficiency. He doesn't stop there, He, the great Doctor of our lives, will mend our wounds, will heal our hurts, and will bring "renewal and restoration" to our heart and soul. This is as my pastor talked about in his sermon today "Restorative Transformation".
I have decided. I'm going to stay.
Friday, May 2, 2008
She was being wooed...
This morning I walked out of my garage apartment to go to work. When I stepped out the door I almost clocked a peacock hen that was apparently standing in front of my door as I opened it. The hen scurried on beyond my truck into the driveway where then I saw "Big Boy", the male peacock at the end of the driveway.
I suddenly realized that something amazing may be about to happen. It was like reading one of John Eldredge's books where he is describing an event on one of his great excursions or trips. I went ahead and got my camera out because I had a feeling that I may need it for this.
I watched patiently for a minute and began to see Big Boy's feathers starting to spread and fan out, and then suddenly they went up to create this incredible array of metallic greens, blues and gold. It is a truly magnificent thing to watch and see. And the fact that one minute he stands there the size of good sized Turkey (w/long feathers) and then the next he literally can spread out almost the width of my driveway with his feathers.
At this point, a normal assumption if you don't really know much about a peacock is that there was probably about to be a brawl, but that is not the case actually.
He was wooing her and she was definitely responding. She strutted up to him and was standing there right in front of him and they were just looking at each other. It was really neat to see as his long feathers spanned out overhead and around her. I was getting to watch first hand one of the beautiful shows of the day from God's own venue.
I know you may be wondering what happened next, well, I had to get to work and they were unfortunately in my way of backing out, so I had to spoil their fun and move them along from within my drive way. The show was over but it was amazing to see it all.
A thought occurred to me while this was all happening and its been on my mind pretty much all day. Even though this was 2 of God's creatures playing their natural roles in their life, I could not help but correlate this some to God's pursuit of us. 
How He brings forth all of His majesty, beauty, security, and affection. How He uses His wings often to protect us, to heal us, to take us in, to rescue us, to shield us from the sin of the world. He too is romancing us, He too is wooing us to show us that our longings are to be quenched in and through Him. But if your like me, often too busy to slow down and watch, we can often miss this beautiful show of love and affection that He has for you and I.
I suddenly realized that something amazing may be about to happen. It was like reading one of John Eldredge's books where he is describing an event on one of his great excursions or trips. I went ahead and got my camera out because I had a feeling that I may need it for this.
I watched patiently for a minute and began to see Big Boy's feathers starting to spread and fan out, and then suddenly they went up to create this incredible array of metallic greens, blues and gold. It is a truly magnificent thing to watch and see. And the fact that one minute he stands there the size of good sized Turkey (w/long feathers) and then the next he literally can spread out almost the width of my driveway with his feathers.
At this point, a normal assumption if you don't really know much about a peacock is that there was probably about to be a brawl, but that is not the case actually.
He was wooing her and she was definitely responding. She strutted up to him and was standing there right in front of him and they were just looking at each other. It was really neat to see as his long feathers spanned out overhead and around her. I was getting to watch first hand one of the beautiful shows of the day from God's own venue.
I know you may be wondering what happened next, well, I had to get to work and they were unfortunately in my way of backing out, so I had to spoil their fun and move them along from within my drive way. The show was over but it was amazing to see it all.
A thought occurred to me while this was all happening and its been on my mind pretty much all day. Even though this was 2 of God's creatures playing their natural roles in their life, I could not help but correlate this some to God's pursuit of us. 
How He brings forth all of His majesty, beauty, security, and affection. How He uses His wings often to protect us, to heal us, to take us in, to rescue us, to shield us from the sin of the world. He too is romancing us, He too is wooing us to show us that our longings are to be quenched in and through Him. But if your like me, often too busy to slow down and watch, we can often miss this beautiful show of love and affection that He has for you and I.
Thursday, May 1, 2008
Idol under cover
I have an idol in my life that I did not even realize was an idol. This is not the first time that I have seen or realized this, but what I cannot get used to is just how crazy it is that I don't see it for so long and then bam, something triggers and reveals. I do thank God for that, but I honestly wish that seeing these types of idols was easier or at least that I could find them more quickly.
I'm going to put it on the table, because this is real life and I just need to be real. I don't have a college degree and when asked about where I went to college or what my degree is in, I more times than none, seem to cower down or shy away in my own little world of shame about it. Why do I do this? Because I have listened to the world and have been influenced by what others think about having a college degree. Don't misunderstand me, I think a college degree is a great thing and personally, I do want to finish college and get my degree some day, however, does this really make me any less of the man that God created me to be?
The mere fact that I have put so much importance in that status because of me not having one, has made that an idol in my own life. In the intellectual sense, I know this makes me no less of a man, but my sinful nature, that same evil voice that tells many other kinds of lies, has to some degree convinced me to believe that I am less. That is putting "college" up on a throne and sticking God down somewhere below it. I can see this so much clearer now, and I want to be prayerful and intentional about God removing it from me. I want to be free of that burden. I want to believe with all my heart that I am the man God has made me to be and that there is nothing less within me. I ask God to make me aware of that roaring lion that is often seeking to devour me in this battle and other battles of the sinful nature. Thank you Lord for just revealing this all to me; You may linger long, but I know You are never late.
I'm going to put it on the table, because this is real life and I just need to be real. I don't have a college degree and when asked about where I went to college or what my degree is in, I more times than none, seem to cower down or shy away in my own little world of shame about it. Why do I do this? Because I have listened to the world and have been influenced by what others think about having a college degree. Don't misunderstand me, I think a college degree is a great thing and personally, I do want to finish college and get my degree some day, however, does this really make me any less of the man that God created me to be?
The mere fact that I have put so much importance in that status because of me not having one, has made that an idol in my own life. In the intellectual sense, I know this makes me no less of a man, but my sinful nature, that same evil voice that tells many other kinds of lies, has to some degree convinced me to believe that I am less. That is putting "college" up on a throne and sticking God down somewhere below it. I can see this so much clearer now, and I want to be prayerful and intentional about God removing it from me. I want to be free of that burden. I want to believe with all my heart that I am the man God has made me to be and that there is nothing less within me. I ask God to make me aware of that roaring lion that is often seeking to devour me in this battle and other battles of the sinful nature. Thank you Lord for just revealing this all to me; You may linger long, but I know You are never late.
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