Sometimes I would leave his office with a sincere joy of new realization and discovery, sometimes I would leave with great sorrow and conviction over the same, but never did I leave feeling unloved or alone. Never did I doubt his own belief of the man inside me bursting to break free of the chains that so heavily weighed me down and numbed me. Never did I doubt that he really cared for me and desired for me to break free and heal from my past to be the man that God had already made me to be. His care, his compassion, his love, and his firmness were all sincere examples of Christ love for me. Dewayne Wood was my counselor, but also, he was a brother in Christ and a sincere friend. We didn't hang out or do anything outside of the counseling office, but maybe after a time, when I would be free from those chains again, I feel sure we would have hung out. Regardless, he was a friend, someone who knew my heart and knew how to read me and get through to me, and it was Christ who did this in him. God blessed this man with amazing gifts, that will have years of impact on many lives even though now he is gone. Thanks to God, Dewayne, and my men's small group, I am alive inside! Still more to work through and heal, still more to dredge up and deal with, but more than ever today I can feel my heart and Dewayne played a key role in this being able to happen.
There is and can be no replacement for Dewayne. He was a priceless individual and irreplaceable. In my sorrows now I am beginning to develop a little fear, a little anxiousness, that I don't have anyone to continue on this journey with; but then I realize that honestly I do. I have my brothers from my small group. Guys whom over the last 10 months I have come to know better, have been more honest with than ever before in my life with my struggles. Guys who don't judge me but rather love me through Christ love. I have seen tremendous growth from these guys over the last several months and with that our relationships with one another have increased all the more. Dewayne had a great impact in this happening as well, as he also counseled two of the other guys in my group on a regular basis and he has helped us all to overcome our anxieties about just being real, no matter the consequence, no matter the subject. We have all grown and Dewayne was part of that. Thank you Dewayne. For just being real, for just answering your call to your ministry, for hearing God and without wavering, followed His will for your life.
I wish everyone I know could have known Dewayne. It seemed to me that he was one that didn't know a stranger. One that could fit into any crowd and just be himself at the same time. The world is a little less complete now without Dewayne and he will be missed, by me and I know of many others. I pray now for his wife, I don't know her and I cannot imagine her pain or loneliness right now, but I know she is hurting, I know she is feeling incomplete, and I know her heart is broken. What I also know is that God is and will be her comforter, her support, her protector, her everything. I hope that all the things written, all the things said, all the stories told will be a testimony to her over her life of being married to a wonderful man of God.
So, tonight, one day and many hours after Dewayne left this world to be with our gracious father, I say goodbye to my counselor, brother and friend. I love you Dewayne and you will be missed always and never forgotten.
"Well done, good and faithful servant..."
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3 comments:
Hey, Brother. Beautifully written. Not that you wanted any praise out of that, but I love that your heart is written on the wall. And, now, as God used Dewayne in your life, may you go through that wall like never before...and never ever forget it.
Thank you Shannon, I appreciate your sweet words and encouragement but most of all that it comes from your heart. Thank you.
You expressed this so much better than I. I am praying for you, and for all of us.
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